gathering in light

Quaker Life Magazine published an article of mine called “The New Quakers: A Faithful Betrayal?” in their January/February 2010 issue. A number of people have asked for me to share it with them so they could read it, so I checked with the editor of QL, Katie Terrell, and gave me permission to share it here with all of you. You can download the .pdf file here. » Read the rest of this entry «

Here are my notes from Sunday’s sermon.

This month we are discussing what is now known as the Quaker peace testimony, but was, interestingly, called the “testimony against war,” up until about the turn of the 20th century. This morning we’re going to have a small group discussion about statements on the peace testimony from various Quaker yearly meetings [you can download the handout we used here]. I wanted to do this because it helps to stress the point that “testimonies” are formed in community and so why not discuss them in community? In other words, the peace testimony is an isolated idea a few people came up with but is a conviction that is interwoven into the fabric of our tradition. We will also see there is a diversity on how to understand it. » Read the rest of this entry «

Adrian Halverstadt, a Quaker pastor, asks this question on the QuakerQuaker forum boards:

I have been thinking a lot about open worship these days. Many of the larger evangelical Friends churches no longer practice open worship in their big venues for many reasons. I guess I am searching for a contemporary definition of open worship and ideas for how other large congregations incorporate their concept of open worship into their weekly big event(s).
What canst thou saith?

Here are my initial thoughts and response that I posted there but thought I’d also put here because I deeply believe that the Quaker way of worship could be beneficial for those of you in other church traditions as well (I’ll be particularly interesting in your thoughts on this subject). » Read the rest of this entry «

Today we are three weeks into the advent season preparing for Christ’s coming. Christmas, for Christians, is not simply a remembrance and celebration of history (though it is certainly that), it is more importantly a proclamation of reality. The father of Quakerism, George Fox, wrote in his journal of his present and personal experience of Christ when he said: “Jesus has come to teach the people himself,” meaning that for Christians there is no waiting for the return of Christ is some distance future, Christ is here with us and among us now. When we talk about the Light of Christ, who is the Inward Light, this is what we mean. Therefore, if Christ came two thousand and nine (or so) years ago, then Christ is also born every year at Christmas and he is born in us every time we make the space in our wombs for the divine gestation to take place. » Read the rest of this entry «

Recently on twitter I said something I’m sure lost me a few followers,  “Let’s make it an amazon free Christmas.” (Though I don’t doubt I say plenty of things on any given day that make people wonder why they associate with me!). But in either case, it’s true, let’s boycott Amazon and every other big corporate chain store this Christmas! This is really how I feel these days. I’m tired of the big company’s crushing all these little local shops. Store after store in our little downtown of Camas is going under and I’ve already mentioned the major bone I have with what Amazon is doing to our independent bookstores. I’ve been boycotting Amazon for all my book buying at least since the time I wrote that post in favor of shopping at places like Fuller Seminary Bookstore, Powell’s books or Abebooks online. But I want to extend this challenge beyond just books to everything that can be purchased on Amazon.com.

One thing I find rather tragic is just how many people Christian bloggers are in bed with Amazon. It’s really surprising that even some of the most alternative thinking folks I know become very mainstream when it comes to getting the cheapest possible books (or other products) they can find, or making money on every book link they have in a post (most often with no disclaimers anywhere).

But I should be up front, I really don’t like any big box stores: Wal-Mart, Target, Whole Foods, you name it (though you will spot me at some of these from time to time, I honestly try and avoid them as much as possible).  And I am already boycotting Amazon, so I’m  not generally tempted to shop there; I guess this makes my challenge more of an open invitation than a personal one. I started turning against these, what we might call, homogeneous consumption troughs back when I was in high-school back in Alliance Ohio. We watched Wal-Mart move in, and destroy tons of the local businesses in our small town and in my estimation Alliance has never fully recovered (here’s an interesting profile of a woman who worked at that particular store). That one experience left me a little bitter and started me on another path: I start looking for different ways (and places) to spend my money to support businesses I believed in.

Let’s face it Amazon.com is the Wal-Mart of the Web. They are taking over, cutting costs, and helping to finish off whatever is left of small town America. In the film “What Would Jesus Buy?” Rev. Billy has a funeral for small town America next to the Wal-Mart headquarters; I’d be interested in having an online (blog) funeral for the same thing Amazon is doing to local bookstores, music stores, and everybody else they’ve set their sights on (I highly recommend the film).

Of course, one response to my Amazon-free Christmas twitter remark was fair enough: “The people who supply to or work for Amazon don’t need the money?” He’s right, yes, they most certainly do, or at least some of them do. But why not go directly to the company, or person selling the good and cutting the middle person out? Further, do you really need that thing you’re buying from Amazon in the first place? Surely you’re not purchasing most items to benefit the other person, so one of our first questions should always be: do I need to buy this thing in order to have what possessing it promises? I’ve found that so many of the things I really need, I can find used on craigslist, at a garage sale, or from a friend who is no longer using it (church email groups are great for this kind of thing!). And of course there’s the whole “You don’t need to buy a gift to give a gift,” line that Rev. Billy preaches that is about as Gospel as they come. Making gifts are really one of the best ways to go. Why spend a lot of money (or any!) on Christmas, is that what it’s all about?

But then I ran across this post on the lives of Amazon.com workers and things start to look even less favorable for the corporation ironically named after the very thing it is helping to decimate (paper anyone?). Here are some of the conditions reported from warehouses in the UK that the post highlights:

- Warned that the company refuses to allow sick leave, even if the worker has a legitimate doctor’s note. Taking a day off sick, even with a note, results in a penalty point. A worker with six points faces dismissal.

- Made to work a compulsory 10-hour overnight shift at the end of a five-day week. The overnight shift, which runs from Saturday evening to 5am on Sunday, means they have to work every day of the week.

- Set quotas for the number of items to be picked or packed in an hour that even a manager described as ‘ridiculous’. Those packing heavy Xbox games consoles had to pack 140 an hour to reach their target.

- Set against each other with a bonus scheme that penalises staff if any other member of their group fails to hit the quota.

- Made to walk up to 14 miles a shift to collect items for packing.

- Given only one break of 15 minutes and another of 20 minutes per eight-hour shift and told they had to notify staff when going to the toilet. Amazon said workers wanted the shorter breaks in exchange for shorter shifts.

Inside The Lives Of Amazon.com Warehouse Employees

Now certainly this is just one report and doesn’t cover every warehouse they have (though the are lawsuits in the US for some of the same issues), but let’s not lose the point: these are not statistics that should be popping up in the warehouses of such rich corporations like Amazon (the way they do with Wal-Mart, etc).  I want to raise a basic question about shopping online: with an even greater amount of anonymity that the Web provides businesses, in what ways are you being careful about the impact of shopping for really cheap things from some other states and countries and how it impacts your local communities (and Does it matter to you?) But also, what about that company’s business practices and how it treats its employees, will you support (i.e. give your money to) a company that treats its employees poorly, runs them into the ground and takes advantage of them? At least with Wal-Mart you can walk in and take a look at how people are being treated, and you can ask the employees how things are going for them. Of course, if we know the answer will we respond? This is generally not the case for our online shopping and Amazon is starting to get in trouble for some of its poor working conditions. Let’s respond this year.

So I reassert my challenge, Let’s have an Amazon.com-free Christmas this year.

[Image from Huffingtonpost.com]

As most of you know by now, thanks (or no thanks) to my facebook and twitter, we’ve had our baby. In keeping with the trend of announcing big life transitions here I wanted to let you all know that my wife Emily gave birth to our daughter this past Friday. Her name is and we will be calling her by her middle name (just ‘M’ here on the web) like her dad. It was an amazingly beautiful and quick birth. We had been sick all the past week. First, L got croup the weekend before Thanksgiving and we ended up taking her to the ER for fear that she was showing signs of having received my asthma genes. Thankfully enough that is most likely not the case, so far as they can tell now. Though she definitely did have that patented croup cough. Well we’re not sure if being at the ER is how Emily and I got sick but either way last week was awash. No turkey for us on Thanksgiving or the day after! Happily a friend from our meeting brought us some turkey soup after the birth.

Anyways, Friday rolls around and Emily said she was having contractions off and on every 15-25 min. in the morning. (I was happy to hear this mainly because three months ago when Emily and I picked days we thought the baby would be born on November 27th was my day!) By 1pm the contractions were steadily 10 min. apart. so I called and canceled our 2:00 appointment we had that day to go and sign for the title of our new house. Then, at 4pm I ran L over to the sitter (her first night away from home without us), went back to pick Emily up and got her to the Southwest Medical Hospital in Vancouver at 4:45pm, when her contractions were just about 7min. apart. Once we got to triage and her vitals were checked, we gave them our birth plan: a quiet, simple, all natural baby birth please. They happily supported our wishes and even went out of their way to provide really good care that was personalized. The midwife, who was still on the clock for a short time, said she was 6 centimeters dilated and progressing perfectly. The nurse started filling the tub in our room for Emily to labor in and we were off.

Laboring in the tub was something Emily was particularly looking forward to, but we didn’t have any idea it would be the scene for all the excitement. After being in the tub for a short while labor really picked up and she said she felt like she needed to push. When I say awhile I am talking, it’s about 6pm at this point. Our main nurse, Coby, came in and said to go ahead and try a “soft push” (whatever that is), she did and he said that Emily was complete. Our doula, Melissa Brewster (who was fantastic btw), noticing labor was progressing fast asked if need be, could Emily in fact give birth in the tub? The answer was an immediate no. But then Melissa asked how would it change things if the water was drained first, the answer was a yes, if necessary they could do it in the tub. So she started draining the water, just in case. By the time the water had drained, the nurse realized Emily was too far along in labor to get her out of the tub and told one of the other nurses, “I know I just told you to get the bed ready, but there’s no time, bring those things here we’re going to have a baby here in the tub!”

Coby was completely ready to deliver the baby, which nice and kind of surprised me given the experience at our first birth. Two years ago, where we were in LA, the nurses wanted nothing to do with catching a baby, let alone in a tub! They told Emily to lay on her side and not push while they called to wake the doctor at 4am (he got there 20 min later).  That was one thing that made our first birth a lot different from this second one. Another interesting feature to last week’s Friday evening was that our mid-wife was off at 6 and the next mid-wife wouldn’t be in until 8. We knew there was no way Emily would last that long and we hadn’t met the OB on call, and at that point I wasn’t even sure there was one available.

They quickly prepped the very tiny bathroom for the birth! I think there were about 5 or 6 of us crammed into that room. At one point there were three of us crouched over the tub helping Emily! Then the baby’s head crowned, the next contraction brought her head half-way out and it paused. Emily made some comment about the “ring of fire” and I started humming the Johnny Cash tune (to myself of course). Right then, out of nowhere the OB swooped into the room, slide past the growing multitude of people crammed together awaiting or assisting in the birth, shook my hand and briefly introduced herself, “Hi I’m dr. so and so, let’s deliver this baby.” She knelt over the tub, Emily had another contraction, and out came M at 6:34pm! She was measured at 6lbs 7oz, and 19 inches long.

It all seemed really effortless on my end, my wife is awesome! I couldn’t believe we were only at the hospital for 1:45 mins. before M was born. I  told Emily she really makes it look easy, maybe I should give it a shot one time around (Sike!).  It was a great birth, we’ve got another healthy, lovely little lady, and we’re all at home settling into to life as a growing family.

There is much to be thankful for this year.

Here are some more pictures if you’re interested:

In my reading of the Disciple’s Prayer (the anabaptist/Quaker name for the Lord’s Prayer), we have to make sure that we don’t limit what forgiveness includes¹. Our (Western) tendency is to think of forgiveness in terms of personal wrongdoings, forgiveness is an individual action.  But in the prayer Jesus clearly draws on a Jewish understand of Jubilee with his selection of the word translated “debts.”². The Greek word there, ophilema, literally means a debt that someone owes both financially as well as morally. Remember in Jesus’ time society wasn’t as split as it is today, a ’sin’ to the Ancient Jew could be familial, social as well as individual. So when Jesus says, forgive people’s debts, as God has forgiven yours, I think he’s thinking back to the forgiveness of debts during the year of jubilee.

There are other examples in the Gospels where Jesus draws on this Debt language. Besides the obvious the prayer for today’s bread, or enough bread for today, reminding us of the sharing of Manna, a narrative linked to Jubilee as well, there is Jesus’ announcement in Luke 4 that the year of Jubilee had come, there’s the fact that the Gospel writers tell the story of Jesus sharing bread and fish six times in four Gospels. There are the religio-social debts canceled by Jesus’ forgiveness. And we should be quick to remember the story of Zaccheus who, through his encounter with Jesus, returned the money he had extorted from his fellow Jews. Zaccheus quite was radically practicing “forgive us our debts, as we have also forgiven the debts of others.”

The prayer of forgiveness and the confession “Do not bring us into a time of trial” presupposes sin and sin as a rupture between human beings, and the risk of the earthly journey (Doctrine, McClendon 156). It admits that we who are in need of divine care have created all kinds of debts with our fellow humans, not least of which are financial. It prays for rescue and deliverance, not just in case it ever happens, but because we need deliverance regularly. How can we live as a faithful community who helps to forgive the spiritual, relational and the financial ruptures of our world?

As we approach Black Friday, and Christmas, which has been swallowed up by over-consumption and credit-card debt, maybe this is the good news we all need to hear this year. God wishes for us to be freed from this debt, and to free others, to live a life of enough, to live in a place where sharing and jubilee mark our interactions with the world far more than what we currently see on TV and in strip-mall America.

[Picture DavidDMuir]

Footnotes

1. See part 3, part 2, and part 1 [↩]
2. cf. John Howard Yoder’s The Politics of Jesus for a further discussion on this topic [↩]

One of the things my favorite (fake) newscaster Stephan Colbert says on a regular bias is that “Major media has a well-known liberal bias.” And this is definitely something many people believe. This perspective has cropped up again recently all over the web, and yes on The Colbert Report has helped, with the new Conservative Bible Project. The ridiculous (and copy-cat) assertation that this project intends to make is that the bible has “a well-known liberal bias.” And as ridiculous as it may first appear I think they are actually right, but not in the way they think.

It seems to me that we could easily consider that major network news and papers such as the NY Times are not in fact liberal at all but rather conservative in that they all seek to put reality “as it is” on display. That is, all major network news from MSNBC to FOX seek to expose or reveal what is happening “out there.” After all isn’t that what news is supposed to be? The opinion section or segment is sectored off for a reason. “News” tries to relay information about reality, about what happened that day, or that week, in your neighborhood and around the globe. It may also seek to expose what is true about this or that issue, person, event, etc.

The problem then isn’t the object of news, the events that transpire, but rather our interpretation on that reality. What gets relayed about the “truth” is where things get a little tangled up (to say the least). Thus in my mind, it’s not that some news is good and some is bad, instead the point is to realize all interpretation is slanted, all interpretation of reality runs through a filter (our own or someone else’s) and thus has a bias. In other words, all news is opinion to some extent. The question becomes for much of how media is handled in this country, which kind of interpretation will sell better, or that tells me what I want to hear the most? Which source, according to me, interprets those events in a way that makes sense to me, connects with me intellectually, spiritually, emotionally, etc?

On the other hand, it seems like very little of what passes as “news” is “progressive” (I admit to be taking some liberties with this term “progressive”). I am taking “progressive” here to mean not taking reality at face-value, what it is, but rather what it should be. Progressive in this way means owning up to the fact that it is embedded in an interpretation of reality, and that it is putting it’s best presentation forward in a compelling way. Here then “conservative” signals trying to tell the events of the day “objectively,” and pretends to report without (subjective) interpretation, and certainly both “conservative” and “liberal” media are guilty of this. In both cases, on the right and left, these modes of relaying information are rooted in the Enlightenment, a kind of “Just give me the straitght-up facts Johnny” mentality that conceals its own embeddedness.

So what is the “progressive” alternative? I take much of blogging, zines, and other subcultural forms of communication to be more progressive (laying outside both liberal and conservative). This is because these forms of media, while they are often upfront already about their biases and influences, just read the about page on virtually every blog for instance, but they are often more interested in imaginating another society, an alternative way of approacing this or that situation, and offering critique of the status quo. And that’s what is so threatening about these progressive forms of “news,” and cultural re-writing. It isn’t content with leaving reality where it is, or concealing its biases (a position that threatens those still pretending to be objective) but pushing it along, changing it, subverting, in the name of some other narrative.

(I am not on the other hand insisting that we should not read/watch major news networks, just that we recognize and are upfront about theirs, as well as our own, positioning.)

Now that I’ve said all that, I can return to the real point of this post and make my hypothesis: the problem with the Bible for those in the conservative Bible project is not that it is either conservative or liberal, but that it is progressive in this manner. In this way it exceeds the categories, continues to be re-interpreted afresh and challenge the status quo of reality. My reading of Jesus is that he is especially active in this regard. Scripture puts forth an alternative vision of reality, an entirely different way of living and approach one another, politics, economics, society, religion, etc. It is not an upside-down viewpoint as so many like to say, it is instead present the world as it should be, or right-side up. And for those who have an interest in stability, safety, and maitaing power “the way its always been” the Bible can be rather unsettling. Jesus’ message was unsettling even for his own followers, we should expect that 2000 years removed from that we will still find people trying to dodge the society that Jesus sought to put in place. And this will bother more than just one side of our polarized society.

[Image from Chris233]

My first six months of youth ministry were a bear. The church I served in had three kinds coming to the youth group when I arrived, one was the pastor’s son and the other two were the daughters of the previous youth leader. But building a youth group from scratch wasn’t the difficult part, what was difficult was some of the politics already in place before our arrival. Within six months the stakes had been claimed and people had chosen sides, some didn’t want to pay for a youth pastor, especially an outsider like me, while others were happy to have us there. There was one woman who was the most outspokenly against us being there and began looking for ways to discredit me and get me removed. I remember for instance her visiting our Sunday School class and investigating the kinds of things I was teaching the youth, where did it come from, who was holding my teaching accountable, etc? I had no trust with this woman and was suspect no matter what I did. When my six month interim was up, the church called together a business meeting to extend my call. A number of people called ex-members who had not gone to the church in years to come back and help to try and get me ousted. It was needless to say, a hostile situation.

I was 21 and hadn’t even been through anything like this before. I started harboring some serious anger towards this one person. I couldn’t go to worship on Sunday without being distracted by her presence constantly wondering what move she would make next, what she might say. I spent a lot of time trying to avoid her eyes, and steer clear of any interaction with her. Then, one day during open worship God clearly told me to go and ask her for forgiveness.

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! You’ve got to be kidding me God? I mean, I was totally blindsided by this person. I came in here and they have just continued to harp on me, spreading untrue rumors, trying to get me ousted, I’m hurt!”

But I realized God was right. Whether or not she had done nothing wrong, the only way for me to be able get clear of the situation, to be able to have enough peace of mind to to worship again, was to ask her to forgive me for my ill-feelings festering towards her.

I wrestled with this conviction for at least three weeks. I tried everything to get out of it. I even forgave her before God, hoping that would clear things up. It didn’t and I finally realized I had no choice. If I wanted to find forgiveness, I would have to extend it. Isn’t it always hardest to ask to be forgiven, I mean giving forgiveness was so easy in comparison. Well you might guess how the rest of the story goes. I approached her after our meeting for worship and sheepishly, my head mostly down, with my heart visibly pounding through my shirt, said to her, I need to talk to you for a second. I said, I have been harboring bitterness towards you ever since you visited my Sunday morning class, I need you to forgive me.” I have never felt so powerless, so vulnerable before someone I trusted so little in my life!

You know what she said? She said she didn’t know what I was talking about, but if I wanted forgiveness, then sure, I can have it and walked away. I think I felt even more vulnerable after my confession than before. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go! She was supposed to admit her wrong, we were supposed to both ask forgiveness, makeup and become friends, living happily ever after. Nothing like that took place. Sadly, her and her family actually left the church not too long after that, and I often remember her family. I really never knew what it was all about, or what my role really was in it, but I do remember that feeling of powerlessness that came with confessing and asking for forgiveness.

This morning we look at the third part of the Disciple’s prayer, it is a prayer that concerns our witness in the world. We pray it as a prayer of vulnerability. That feeling of powerlessness that I had back then, even the fact that the situation didn’t resolve the way I thought it would, the fact that I had no power to change the situation but was still to follow through with confessing a need for forgiveness (and even the somewhat genuine offer of forgiveness I gave her) are the very movements that shape not only our own faith but our corporate witness in the world. Confession is not only an act, it is an attitude.

This third strand of the prayer, this “forgive us our debts,” and “the do not bring us to the time of trial” is to be the very shape of how the church interacts with, or witnesses in the world.Too often our attitude and posture as Christians in the world is caricatured as shouting past one another, infighting, arguing fine doctrinal points, being out of touch and irrelevant, as though we can strong arm people into church. When we think about our witness as the church in the world, we must strive to be people who live out the power of weakness, people who are known for their forgiveness, who openly confess their need to be forgiven. Matt. 6:12-13 is a prayer of confession that is as much an attitude as it is an action, this vulnerability is to be at the heart of our mission as the church.

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Forgiveness and Cycles: In this last part of the prayer then, there are two markers of this vulnerability: forgiveness and confession. “Forgive us our debts, as we have also forgiven our debtors,” is first and foremost concerned with the cycles of literal debt, violence, of sin, oppression and hatred, that confound our world. Jesus here quite simply offers us the key to short-circuiting these, what we might call cycles of exchange. If you forgive others, God will forgive you. That is, if you do not hang onto the offense committed against you, but you instead let it go, the cycle of exchange can be broken. Forgiveness is always a gift, the word debt here should quickly bring to mind the Jewish concept of Jubilee. Gift, as we see in Jubilee, does not anticipate something in return. My approaching the woman and asking forgiveness was not exactly a gift, I still had expectations that were even hidden to myself about how she might respond.

To mention that breaking these cycles of exchange with the gift of forgiveness leaves one vulnerable probably goes without saying. Not only was I left feeling naked before a woman who had hurt me by confessing my own harboring of anger, but she never really reconciled with me. But to say that I approached her on purely good intentions would be to mislead you. Forgiveness is a mixed bag, that it is complex is to say the least. It often leaves us feeling completely striped naked and defenseless.

This is of course, how it should be.

Take for instance a key passage in the Gospel of Matthew that helps interpret this prayer for forgiveness. In Matthew 18:23-35, Jesus tells a parable of a servant whose financial debt had become debilitating. It says he owed 10,000 talents which is said to be equal to around 6,000 denari. You know how many denari a slave would get for a days wage? One. So in order to get 6,000 denari for just one talent would take probably half a lifetime. In other words, this is an astronomical amount of debt [school loans anyone?]. Anyways, The king calls him in, wanting to settle the accounts and the servant falls down to his knew and pleads with him, “‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.” And then it says that the King’s heart went out to him and forgave him the loan. Out of complete act of mercy the king declares jubilee and cancels the entire debt.

You know what happens next. The servant returns home and one of his fellow servants who owed him talents came fell on his knees before him. This second servant repeats almost precisely what the first servant said to the king, “Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’” But unlike the king, the first servant, whose outrageous debt had been canceled, he had his fellow servant through in jail until all of the debt was repaid. The king hears of this, flips his top, as surely as anyone else would do, and throws the first servant in jail, not as retaliation, but as a way of saying, if you do not want to work by the gift economy of jubilee of which I canceled your debts, then you to must go to jail. That is, if you want to play by the cycle of exchange, as it appears you do, then the cycle of exchange says you too must be imprisoned.

The king made himself vulnerable, not simply by the fact that he lost 10,000 talents but by the fact that he risked the servant abusing the new found freedom he was given. Now surely the lesson here is not that it is okay to throw people in jail if they don’t return the favor given to them. I would be remiss to have tried to condemn my friend for not returning the confession I offered her. The point is that we have the choice to work in the power of the world, and operate out of the cycle of exchange, the vicious cycles we see all around us. Or we choose to embody this prayer, to break that cycle, stop it in its tracks, throw a wrench in the machine, and offer forgiveness by opening ourselves up to way of vulnerability.

§

The Act of Confession: Then in the last part of the prayer Jesus teaches us to pray: “Do not bring us into a time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one.” Some of you are more familiar with the translation, “Do not lead us into temptation…”Questions arise with this second translation about whether or not God might in some tricky way lead us into temptation. I am unhappy with this translation and the confusion it causes. For one James says, “No one, when tempted, should say, “I am being tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil and he himself tempts no one. But one is tempted by one’s own desire, being lured and enticed by it…” (James 1:13-15) Instead, the better reading is “do not bring us into a time of trial, or testing.” God may not tempt us to do wrong, but God surely tests faith, and we can see testings through church history that for those who wish to live out the way of Jesus trials were unavoidable. When Jesus uttered these fragile words, his movement was still insignificant in size and constantly coming more and more in contact with religious and political authorities.

Not only was Jesus’ own faith tested in Matthew 4 by the “Evil One,” but the disciples got a taste of a real faith-testing trial at the Garden of Gethsemane, who were asked to pray and remain alert, yet fell prey to their own human desires for sleep. Then think of the trial during the arrest, do we draw the sword or not, then there are of course, the trials that Peter faced and who didn’t prove to do so hot in his testing. When we finally get to Jesus’ death, only a few disciples still remain. Thus, I take, “Do not bring us into a time of trial, as a prayer to be spared from the worst of it all. In other words it is a way of admitting that we as disciples are vulnerable.

It is as Dallas Willard says, it is a “vote of no confidence.”

Jesus taught us these words, to be said with regularity, words that admit our propensity to stumble and misstep. We can see from this line of the prayer that confession, both the act and the attitude, was to be a part of the regularly vocabulary of the church. It might be suggested that we follow our friends in Alcoholics Anonymous and open with our own confession, “Hi I’m Wess, and when tested I stumbled.”

What would the church look like if its mission started from a place of vulnerability? Does it just look like a bunch of people who put themselves down, always feeling guilty? No!

This should not be taken, as it usually is within Evangelical churches, as a reason to feel guilty about something. Just google ‘confession.’ There is a complete industry of books and online websites, bulletin boards for people to confess all their sins, all their darkest secrets. [It’s a little disturbing really.] You can make your confession anonymous, or if you’re looking for something a little more warm and fuzzy, you can go to the site called group hug where others will virtually gather around you for a big squeeze. You can find guides to how to get the most of your confession, there are sites for the more transgressive confessions, one site hints at something you’d expect from Jerry Springer show, “droppedthebomb.com.” There are people who have gained celebrity status by “whistle blowing.” Politicians are happy to confess their opponents secrets (whether they are true or not). And it is easy enough to find confessions in movies, literature and TV Shows everywhere. Confession, to one degree or another is everywhere. And for the church, there are a lot of people walking around feeling guilty all the time. But I don’t think guilt is what the Disciple’s prayer is getting at. Instead, this vote of no confidence, this confession, is Jesus giving us permission to not have it all together.

Thus confession becomes as much and attitude that church is to be shaped by. Instead of being a church of the Jim Bakers, the Ted Haggard’s and Jimmy Swaggart’s, the church that is in the big time, that has it all together and is in a place to call judgment down on others, only to find they too have their own vulnerabilities, they too are human in need of constant rescuing, they too have their dirty little secrets, we have been given permission in this prayer to stop with all this phony pretentious mumbo jumbo. We say, God spare us from the tests we recognize we are fallible.

Here in Jesus’ words, inscribed into the formative prayer of the church, we are invited to be honest about where we are and this is precisely the point of genuine faith. We own up not just to our personal failings, but to our corporate missteps. Look, we as the church botch it, we can screw things up as much as we can help things. If the church started from a place of confession in the world, I think the world and the church would be a better place. Not only would we be more readily able to admit that we too can be hypocrites, but that we don’t have it all figured out. Instead of always having an answer or what we perceive to be the right answer on any given doctrinal topic, what if we owned up to the fact that we so often don’t really know the answer?

Confession creates an openness we need in the church. As soon as we assume we can learn nothing from another person, because of their age, their religion [they are from that Quaker group!], their politics, we have stopped praying this prayer. I tend to think that people who are the quickest to come forward with answers about this or that question about the Bible, or this or that question about a social issue, is a person who is deeply unsure about what lies beyond that answer. Our pat answers can be a coping mechanism for a lack of faith. After all, is faith a belief in something that is truly unknown? As soon as we suggest that we have figured out the infinite with our finite minds, that we know how many angels dance on the head of a needle, who will be and who will not be in heaven, or what God believes about this or that concept or issue, we stop praying this prayer and start praying our own version “God, Let me show you how I am infallible when put to the test.”

So for me, confession has to be about openness to change, an attitude of vulnerability that remains open to the Spirit’s present guidance. Confession admits we are on a spiritual journey, wrestling with the things of this world, the testings, the failings, the weaknesses, not just our own, but others whose actions so often deeply impact our lives. Confession, the “I can’t do it” part of all this, is to be woven into the very fabric of our spiritual practice.

Thus we desperately need this prayer, this confession, that we may not be brought to trial, that God will rescue us when we find ourselves there. It is a prayer of humility, and brokenness. The witness of the church is to be formed by the practicing of vulnerability through regularly giving and receiving of forgiveness and attitude of confession.

Let me end with this quote: Joan D. Chittister from her book Heart of Flesh:

We are vulnerable on all sides, in and out, p and down, past, present, and future. We fear vulnerability. It takes a great deal of living to discover that, actually, vulnerability comes to us more as friend than as enemy. Vulnerability may be the greatest strength we have. Vulnerability bonds us to one another and makes us a community in league with life. Because we need one another, we live looking for good in others, without which we ourselves can not survive, will not grow, can not become what we ourselves have the potential to be. [Change in our lives and in our communities cannot happen without this]. Vulnerability is the gift given to us to enable us to embed ourselves in the universe. We are born dependent and spend the rest of our lives coming to wholeness. It is a delicate and dangerous process, requiring and untold amount of support and an amazing degree of forgiveness as we stumble and grope our way from one new part of life to another. Vulnerability, in fact, is the one hallmark of life which, try as we might, we can not cure. Vulnerability, therefore is clearly part of the spiritual process, clearly part of the human endeavor. (142-143)

So then, what does it look like for us as the church to really truly embody the prayer:
“And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And do not bring us to the time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one.”

{Image from Princess KB}

This is the sermon on the Disciple’s Prayer from Sunday morning.

This morning we step foot inside the second strand of the Disciple’s prayer, the ethics strand, the strand that gives us guidance on how we are to live in the day to day. We see that even the God of the cosmos is also interested in the giving of something as mundane as a loaf of bread. Last week we discussed the first strand, the strand of the worshiping community who is reoriented around one father, Our Father, in heaven. This week we look at the implications of that reorientation. If God is our father, then what can we expect? What do we pray for? And how do we act? The prayer, “

Give us this day our daily bread or,
Give us this day the bread we need or again,
Give us provisions for what we need today,

is clearly concerned with our ethics.

The role this part of the Disciple’s prayer has in our lives may shift from time to time. At one point we may be on the side of desperation, crying out, “God, give me something to eat. Anything at all.” At other times, we may be less desperate, but still panicked, “God, I’m ashamed to ask, but help us with these little things.” Then of course, there are other times when we pray this prayer knowing full well we already have our daily, weekly and possibly monthly bread. Then we pray this prayer as, “God, thank you for my food, help me to give it away.”

The prayer for daily bread, is also a prayer to become givers of daily bread. We as the worshiping community, formed around our allegiance to God the Father and his kingdom allows us, even calls us, to live out a different ethic than the one our world operates by.

When we pray the Disciple’s Prayer we risk submitting ourselves to the call of the Gospel, we find that we are called not only to pray this pray, but to live it, and be its answer however we can. Or as the Quaker Elton Trueblood said, “When we pray for bread we are entering consciously into the fellowship of those who bear the mark of hunger.” (E. Trueblood, 52). This prayer helps us to fully enter into the Gospel, and empathize not only with God’s desires, but with those calling upon God to respond.

Growing up I have prayed both sides of this prayer. The prayer of desperation, and the prayer to become a giver. Growing up, we had very little. My step-father stopped working in 1992, and with six kids, a few animals, and a mother who tried to work part-time and take care of the family, we had major difficulties making ends meet. Our family of eight lived on $12,000 a year. I remember praying for daily bread. I remember not having food, I remember volunteering at food giveaway centers and being glad they would allow us to take food home with us too. I remember our house going through foreclosure a couple times, yet a random check arrived in our mailbox allowing us to keep the house. I remember the Christmases when the church we attended bought us gifts so there could be something under the tree.

Praying for bread is something I can identify with (at least to some extent) and the beautiful thing is that along with this empathy, was the experience that God truly was the provider of daily bread. We did have what we needed, and often it was Christians who helped us from getting into an irreversible downward spiral. God worked through the church to answer our prayers for daily bread.

How about you? Where are you located in this prayer? What is your daily bread?
Eat.
When we pray this prayer we are asking God for real bread, and trusting that he has provided this bread for others in the past. Bread is an essential object in the Bible. It comes up in all kinds of stories, it was one the main form of sustenance for many in antiquity. What are some of the stories that you recall dealing with bread from the Scriptures?

I would think the most obvious and powerful are Jesus’ final supper, Jesus’ feeding the 4,000 and 5,000 with fish and loaves, (or bagels and lox) and God providing Manna in the Old Testament. When I pray, “Give us this day our daily bread,” I almost instantly go back to the story in Exodus 16 where God provided Manna to the Children of Israel. I think when Jesus was constructing this prayer he had this in the back of his mind.

This is a story our Manna and Mercy small group just discussed this past Monday. While the Children of Israel were on the move through the desert to the promised land, they began to get really hungry and complained to God that he’d rescued them from Egypt only to bring them out in the desert to starve to death. God answered this complaint, “I am going to rain bread from heaven for you, and each day the people shall go out and gather enough for that day. In that way I will test them, whether they will follow my instruction or not.” (Exodus 16:4) Thus YHWH rained bread, called Manna, or literally translated, “What is it?” The instructions were pretty straightforward, but as we all know, they weren’t easy to keep.

You know how the story goes, God provides the manna for all of them. Each was to gather only as much as they needed for the day (smaller clans got less, larger clans got enough for all their people), hoarding wasn’t allowed and was unnecessary because God was providing new Manna daily. This flew in the face of the Egyptian culture they were used to. In Egypt where they were slaves the worked for the Pharaoh to gather up and accumulate as much as possible. God’s way was different. When some of the people hoard manna, just in case, the next day it began to rot and get worms in it! Yuck!!! Talk about leftovers going sour!

There’s a lot to be learned about God’s economics from this passage, and while we may want to try and quickly write it off as being from the Old Testament and no longer relevant today, Jesus’ prayer for “Our Daily Bread today,” inscribes into the heart of Christianity. This kind of sharing economy, where everyone take enough, so that there is enough for others.

Just like Manna was real bread that sustained the Children of Israel, when we pray this prayer, we are praying for real bread to sustain us. We’re shouldn’t spiritualize this prayer too quickly, when Jesus taught this part about bread he did not mean first and foremost a good sermon [Lucky for you!], or a especially nice quiet time though I  it could be these things as well. For this prayer, Bread is bread, and then by extension it can be other things. In recalling this story, we remember the ethics around what it means to allow God to provide just enough.

Enough.
Now I think for the most of us here, when we pray this prayer we fall into one of the two groups of people I mentioned earlier. The first group is the people who have enough, and the second are the people who need the people with enough to help them have enough also. As one person commented on my Face book: Getting to enough should be everyone’s shared goal. Those with more than enough should work towards enough, and those with less than enough should humbly aim for enough as well.

Therefore the translation, “Give us this day the bread we need,” hits close to both groups of people. It reminds us of the Manna story, reminding us that this is a prayer for enough. This prayer reminds us that there are limits and that we need to limit ourselves to what we need, and thank God for enough. When we pray for enough, we pray for God to establish his kingdom economy, where sharing is central. I take what I need so that you too can have what you need. To go beyond this, to pray for tomorrow’s needs as well is to fall into the temptation of hoarding.

Dallas Willard writes that this way of praying for what we need today helps form within us a trusting attitude towards God. I ask for what I need today, and I trust that God will also provide for tomorrow, just the same as today. He says,

“This is how Children do it, of course. A Mother who discovers that her child is saving up oatmeal, pieces of toast, or strips of bacon [or in L’s case pieces of chocolate] for fear of not having food tomorrow has cause to be alarmed. The world being what it is, we can all too easily imagine situations in which the child’s actions would be reasonable. But in any normal situation parents will be astonished and pained that the child does not trust them to provide for it day by day. A child should never have to even think about future provision until it grows older and has that responsibility” (Willard 261).

In this prayer for enough we are reminded that we live in a world that is connected and that our lives have effect on the lives of others. We can often intentionally or unintentionally isolate ourselves from the deep needs of others, in our very rich society there is a vast separation between the rich and poor. Our call to have enough holds us accountable to our brothers and sisters around the world. A theology of enough balances out a culture of excess. It reminds us that to become takers of more than enough is to forfeit the chance of being kingdom givers. One person’s excess and over-consumption is another person’s daily bread. And I believe it is this ethic is inscribed into the heart of Christianity, and it is this that Quakers have tried to revive with their practices of plainness and simplicity.

We don’t have to look far to find examples of how greed and a theology of excess can insulate us from and dehumanize the poor. In a society that prides itself on excess and over-consumption it is no surprise that we have to take from others to fill our wants. A theology of enough, the prayer for daily bread, is the difficult remedy for this greed. Gandhi once said, “There is enough for everyone’s need, but there is not enough for everyone’s greed.” True simplicity, the kind Quakers have always sought to practice comes out of a love for God and others, it humanizes those who are in need, it looks out for them and advocates that they too have enough, just like us. Quakers at their best have been givers, rather than takers of Bread.

Give.
Shane Claiborne writes in one of my favorite books, The Irresistible Revolution, that “To pray my daily bread is a desecration; we are to pray our daily bread, for all of us.” And so when we pray this prayer we recognize that others are praying this prayer as well. My brother who is out of work praying for daily bread, your sister who was recently laid off is praying for daily bread, the woman who’s husband just walked out on her and left her with two hungry children at home are praying for daily bread. Those of us who are struggling to make ends meet are praying for enough to get by. And those of us who are thankful to be stable and to have extra pray for ways to be givers of daily bread.

And so I think we come to the mission of the church as it is found in this second strand of the prayer. We are to not only pray for bread but to give it if we are a community gathered around “Our Father” who provides. We set out to be like “Our Father,” as Paul says in Ephesians, “Be imitators of God,” Our Father in heaven by loving others and practicing concrete acts of giving. We break down the walls of isolation, and seek first to discover how we can respond to those around us who are in need.

This past February I was a co-facilitator for a weekend retreat on Convergent Friends in the Redwood Forest of northern California. During that weekend we took time to discuss what it meant for us as Quakers to embody the testimony of plainness. One 18th century Quaker discipline reads:

“It is also our concern to exhort all friends, both men and women to watch against the growing sin of pride, and beware of adorning themselves in a manner disagreeable to the plainness and simply of the truth we make profession of (The Old Discipline, 196).” [Interestingly, it is right next to section on poverty, I think it shows that these two things are interconnected.]

Our task at that retreat was to flesh out what plainness looks like in 2009. I remember one lady sharing that she was led to get rid of half her clothes, and she pointed out just how difficult it was to get rid of 50% of her clothing. She said she had given 25% a number of times, but this call to give up half was excruciating. But there was another catch, she had to give all the clothes away personally, to the people who needed them. She wouldn’t take them to a charity and let someone else do it for her, she felt it was essential that she be connected to the process of giving. I think she embodied the heart of this prayer.

Many of you have done similar things: you’ve given food and clothes to those who have needed, that’s daily bread. Many of you have taken people in when they had no place to go, that too is daily bread. In that same Quaker disciple it says, We treat the poor as people who are in our family, and we should think of giving to those in need as lending to the Lord who will repay in due time.

Response.
And so you have been invited to be givers and bring things that would be helpful for homeless people in our area during winter this year. We can be givers of daily bread right here as a church family. We can do this by being prepared to be on both sides of this prayer: The prayer of desperation, and the prayer of enough which compels us to become givers of bread.

And what better thing to represent this tension of giving and taking than a trashcan, probably not the first thing to come to your mind? A couple weeks ago we watched a really great film on dumpster diving, and in that film we got to catch a glimpse of what it looks like for people to live off another person’s excess. Trashcans in our society are receptacles of excess and over-consumption. They contain our refuse and the things we wish to keep hidden from our eyes. But as kingdom people we reverse this meaning and subvert it, we can make it into a receptacle of sharing, of manna, of enough.

My friend Greg Russinger started this project, a trashcans can make a difference, in Portland as a way to embody God’s sharing economy with something that for many of us simply represents waste. A trashcan can make a difference, if we cut back on our excess, cut back on our waste, and lived sought only to have enough then we could have a trashcan filled with gifts rather than trash.

Greg writes on the TCMD website:

In our culture, the trashcan is where we collect our refuse—those unwanted and unclean items that we want to be rid of. For many however, the trashcan represents life—a medium through which daily sustenance is found. In the spirit of the ancient practice of gleaning, in which the leftover crops at the edges of farmers’ fields were left for the poor and the stranger, we’ve reclaimed the trashcan as symbol of hope and given birth to a new initiative: A Trashcan Can Make a Difference (TCMD).

TCMD is a collaborative redistribution effort that uses trashcans for the collection of new goods for those in need. The items collected are then specifically distributed to those in need through partnerships we’ve developed with other local non-profit organizations. TCMD is continually growing through franchise activism—that is, a growing network of concerned individuals, families, businesses, groups, churches and schools collaborating autonomously to host a trashcan in various locales, providing those communities with a visual reminder and an opportunity to embrace the values of generosity, social concern and cooperative living.

It is a network of sharing. For now, I suggest we leave this trashcan in the foyer near my office where we all can have access for it. This will become a place for us to give things to for poor people who need what is inside this. If you know of people are who in need feel free to come and take from this. If you are in need feel free to come and take. We can continue to grow in the ethics of the kingdom by being a community of sharers, givers, and enough.

During our open worship of prayer and silence I invite you all to come up and place things inside this can so in an act of giving Daily Bread. You can put anything in here, if you didn’t bring something but you want to put something in it you can come back later and add to it or you can put money in there and we will use that money to fill in what things may be missing from the can.

As you come forward I invite you to mediate on the part of the prayer we discussed today: “Give us this day the bread we need,” and remember those who are in need. Pray it for your yourself, pray it for your family…And remember you have been invited to participate in the answering of this prayer.

Closing Prayer:

Old Mennonite version of the Disciple’s Prayer:

Abba Father God, Bless your holy name.
Let your reign come now, Let your desires be carried out.
Bring your peace to birth, As in heav’n, so on Earth
Give us bread, daily; Free us, as we free.
When the way is hard, Be our guide and guard.
Your rule, power; and praise Reign supreme, always.